簡短有哲理的英語笑話摘抄大全

　　笑話是一種用來逗笑取樂的文體。笑話,不僅能讓同學們在日常生活和學習中不時地會心一笑,還能從中學習到不少的英語知識。小編整理了簡短有哲理的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　簡短有哲理的英語笑話篇一

　　Coffee Problem

　　A man was at the doctor's office. "Every time I drink a cup of coffee, Doctor, I have astabbing pain in my right eye. What should I do?" he asked .

　　"Take the spoon out of your cup. " answered the doctor.

　　咖啡問題

　　一位男子來到醫生的辦公室。“醫生，每次我喝咖啡，我的右眼都有刺痛感。您說我該怎麼辦?”他問道。

　　“把勺子從咖啡杯裡拿出來。”醫生回答說。

　　簡短有哲理的英語笑話篇二

　　A man handed a pair of slacks to the department-store clerk. "I'd like these altered, please," he said. The clerk asked for the sales receipt, but after searching his pockets, the man replied he had lost it. The clerk informed him that it was store policy to do free alterations without a receipt.

　　"Okay, then, " the man said, "I'd I like to return the slacks. clerk processed the return and gave him cash equaling the cost of the slacks.

　　The man pushed the money back across the counter. "Now I want to buy the slacks, " he said. The clerk rang up the sale, bagged the slacks and handed them to him with a receipt.

　　Triumphantly, he put the slacks and the receipt on the counter. "I'd like to have these altered, please."

　　花招

　　一位男子把一條寬鬆褲遞給百貨商店職員。“我想換一條。”他說。店員向他要售貨收據。這位男子翻遍了他的口袋，最後只得說收據丟了。店員告訴他說沒有收據不準隨意更換，這是商店的規章。

　　“那好吧，”這位男子說，“我要把這條褲子退掉。”店員按程式辦理了退貨手續並把等於褲子價格的現金給了他。

　　這位男子把錢從櫃檯上推回去。“現在我還要這條褲子，”他說。店員用收銀機收下了錢，把那條褲子裝進包裡，並把它們連同收據遞給了他。

　　這男子終於以勝利者的姿態把褲子和收據放在櫃檯上，說：“我要把這條褲子換了。”

　　簡短有哲理的英語笑話篇三

　　The Big Baby

　　"You'll have to take care of the baby today," a woman told her husband . " I'm not feeling well."

　　"Then you must stay in bed and rest, dear. " her husband said. "I'll be pleased to look afterour baby. "

　　"Thank you. I'll have a quiet day and I'll soon get better. " his wife told him.

　　"Shall I do the shopping for you as well?" her husband asked.

　　She was very pleased and said, "That will help me very much. I'll give you a list of things tobuy. "

　　She wrote out the list and gave it to him.

　　"You can get all these things at the supermarket," she said.

　　"You can put the baby in the shopping cart, then you won't have to leave him outside."

　　The man took the baby to the supermarket and put him in the shopping cart. Then hepushed the shopping cart along the rows of things to buy and looked for those that were onhis list.

　　At first all was well, but then the baby began to cry.

　　Then he started to scream.

　　And scream!

　　And SCREAM!

　　"Keep calm ,George, " the man said. "Don't get excited. Don't shout, George. Don't loseyour temper, George.

　　A woman in the supermarket heard him saying these things. She walked up to him.

　　"I think you are wonderful," she said. "You are so patient with your little George. "

　　"Madam, " the man said, "I'm George. He's Edward.

　　大嬰兒

　　“今天你得照看孩子，”女人對丈夫說，“我身體不舒服。”

　　“親愛的，那你呆在床上休息，”丈夫說，“我很高興照顧我們的孩子。”

　　“謝謝。今天我將清靜一下了，我很快就會好點的。”

　　“我為你去買東西，好嗎?”

　　她很高興地說：“這幫我很大忙呢。我給你列個要買的東西的單子。”

　　她列好單子，遞給他。

　　“在超級市場你能買到這些東西，”她說。

　　“你把孩子放在購物手推車裡，就不用把孩子留在外面了。”

　　男人帶著孩子到超市，把他放在推車裡。然後推著車子沿著貨架走，尋找單子列出的東西。

　　開始一切都進行得很順利，接著孩子開始哭起來。

　　然後孩子開始尖聲喊叫。

　　尖叫。

　　又尖叫。

　　“保持鎮靜，喬治，”男人說，“不要衝動。不要喊叫，喬治。不要發脾氣，喬治。”

　　一個女人在超市聽到他說的這些話。她走到他跟前。

　　“我覺得你真不錯，“她說，”你對你的小喬治真有耐心。”

　　“夫人，”男人說，“我是喬治，他是愛德華。”