關於英語笑話精選大全

　　近些年,冷笑話作為一種特殊的幽默方式在網際網路、電視節目、書籍雜誌上廣泛流傳。小編分享關於英語笑話，希望可以幫助大家!

　　關於英語笑話：A good witch

　　One afternoon, there was this good witch who was flying along, when all of a sudden, she heard this soft crying from down below. When she landed, she saw this yellow frog. Touched by his sadness, the witch asked why he was crying.

　　"Sniff. None of the other frogs will let me join in all their frog games. Boo hoo."

　　"Don't cry, little one.", replied the witch, and with a wave of her magic wand, the frog turned green. All happy now, the frog was checking himself over when he noticed that his penis was still yellow. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if he saw the wizard, he'd fix things up for him.

　　So happily, the little green frog hippity-hopped along his merry way.

　　Feeling quick happy about herself, the witch once more took to the skies, and once again, she heard some crying, but this time of a thunderous sort. So down to the ground she flew only to discover a pink elephant. The witch asked him why he was crying.

　　"Sniff. None of the other elephants will let me join in all their elephant games. Boo hoo."

　　Now if you have ever seen an elephant cry, you know it to be a pathetic looking sight, but a PINK elephant crying is just downright heart-breaking, and that is just how the witch felt. So once again, she waved her magic wand, and *POOF*, the elephant was all grey.

　　All happy now, the elephant was checking himself all over when he noticed that his penis was still pink. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if saw the wizard, he would fix things up for him.

　　At this point, the elephant just started wailing. "I don't know where the wizard is", hesobbed.

　　"Oh that's easy. Just follow the yellow pricked toad", said the good witch.

　　關於英語笑話：Whale of a Tale

　　Willie the Whale and his whale girlfriend, Monica, are swimming happily through the ocean when they come upon a boat. On seeing the boat, Willie says, "Hey, I've got a great idea! Let's swim up under that boat and blow out really hard through our blowholes!"

　　Monica says, "Oh, I don't know..."

　　"Come on, it'll be fun, come on, just this once!", says Willie.

　　Monica agrees and they swim up under the boat and blow out, capsizing the boat and sending hapless sailors into the briny blue.

　　As they are swimming away, Willie says, "Wow, that was fun, wasn't it? Hey! I've got another idea! Let's swim back there and eat all the sailors!"

　　To which Monica, exasperated, replies, "Look, I agreed to the blow job, but I'm not swallowing any seamen."

　　關於英語笑話：Martial art dog

　　There was a young couple who lived in a town filled with crime. After three of their neighbors' houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.

　　So the young wife went to the pet store and said, "I need a good guard dog." The clerk replied, "Sorry, we're all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But, he does knowskarate."

　　The wife didn't believe the clerk, so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair." The dog went up to the chair and broke it into pieces. Then he said to the dog, "Karate that table." The dog went up to the table and broke it in half.

　　So the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a big guard dog. The husband was of course disappointed and somewhat skeptical about the Scottie dog's abilities as a guard dog.

　　When she told her husband that the dog knew karate, he said, "Karate my ass!" And to this very day, he is in the hospital.

　　關於英語笑話：Replacement rooster

　　A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster.

　　Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car in a cloud of feathers. Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse and rang the doorbell. A farmer appeared.

　　The man somewhat nervously said, "I think I killed your rooster, please allow me to replace him."

　　"Suit yourself," the farmer replied, "the hens are round the back."