英語笑話帶翻譯大全

　　英語笑話,幽默故事,如選擇合理,運用得當,可以成為英語教師有力的教學工具和完美的附加教材,起到輔助教學的良好作用。本文是中英文對照英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

　　中英文對照英語笑話：Taking attendance 點名

　　On my first day of classes at my university I took a front-row seat in my literature course. The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose. Then he ambled over to the lectern***講臺***, took out his class book and began, "Baker, Black, Brooks, Carter, Cook..." I was working feverishly to get down all the names when I felt a tap on my shoulder. The student in back of me whispered, "He's taking attendance."

　　大學的第一天，文學課我坐在了前排。教授告訴我們這學期必須得讀五本書，他提供我們可供選擇的作者名單。隨後他緩步走上講臺，拿出課本，“貝克、布萊克、布魯斯、卡特、庫克…”為了寫下所有的名字，我不得不瘋狂的作著記錄。這時有人輕輕的拍我肩膀，坐在我後面的學生悄悄告訴我：“他在點名呢。”

　　中英文對照英語笑話：停車費

　　A businessman walked into a New York City bank and asked for the loan officer. He said he was going to Europe on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000. The loan officer said the bank would need some security for such a loan. The business man then handed over the keys to a Rolls Royce that was parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checked out and the loan officer accepted the car as collateral***抵押品*** for the loan. An employee then drove the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parked it there. Two weeks later the businessman returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest which came to $15.41. The loan officer said, "We do appreciate your business and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a bit puzzled. While you were away we checked and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why you would bother to borrow $5,000?" The business man replied: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for 2 weeks for 15 bucks?"

　　一個商人走進紐約一家銀行詢問信貸員。他說他準備出差去歐洲兩個星期需要借款5000美金。信貸員說銀行借款需要提供擔保品。商人馬上掏出停在銀行門前的勞斯萊斯汽車的鑰匙。一切手續辦妥後銀行信貸員接受了汽車做為貸款的抵押。店員把汽車開到銀行地下車庫並停放在那裡。 兩個星期後商人從歐洲回來，償還了5000元借款以及15.41元的利息。信貸員問：“非常感謝您的光顧，這筆交易做得也很完美，但是我們有一個疑問，你離開後我們查了一下發現您是一個富翁。為什麼您會不怕麻煩來這借5000元呢?” 商人回答：“除了您這我還能在紐約市的其他地方只需付款15元就能停車兩個星期嗎?”

　　中英文對照英語笑話：I want a day off 想請一天假

　　Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. "Boss," he says, "we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff." "We're short-handed, Smith", the boss replies, "I can't give you the day off." "Thanks, boss," says Smith, "I knew I could count on you!"

　　一天，史密斯去見他的客戶部領導，“老闆”，斯密斯說，“我們家明天要大搞清潔，我老婆需要我回去幫忙清潔閣樓和車庫，搬搬挪挪什麼的。”“斯密斯啊，你也知道，我們現在人手已經不夠了”老闆說，“明天的假我是沒法給你批了”。“多謝老闆，”史密斯說，“我就知道跟著您幹準沒錯”。

　　中英文對照英語笑話：He never heard a thing 他什麼都沒聽到

　　Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when oneirate***生氣的*** customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."

　　我在郵局上班，對於顧客們的各種情緒早已習以為常了。所以，有一天當一個生氣的顧客氣沖沖地來到我的工作臺時，我還是非常平靜地問她，“有什麼問題嗎?”“我早上上街了，”女顧客說，“我回到家的時候，我看到一個卡片，卡片說郵遞員要給我們家送包裹，但沒人在家。可是我的丈夫整個早上都在家啊。他說他什麼都沒聽到”。在表示了歉意之後，我把包裹給了她。“噢，太好了”，那位女顧客喜形於色。“我們等這東西都等多少年了!”“是什麼好東西?”我問。“我丈夫的新助聽器”。