讓人抓狂的英語笑話閱讀

　　笑話,是民間文學中的一朵奇葩,具有語言詼諧、故事生動、短小精悍的特點。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　狗為什麼看著我?

　　Guest: Why does your dog sit there and watch meeat?

　　客人：你的狗為什麼坐在那兒看著我吃飯?

　　Hotel Host: I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from.

　　旅館老闆：我想不出，除非是因為你用的是它平時吃飯的盤子。

　　篇二

　　CEO: My wife made a millionaire out of me.

　　執行長：我妻子使我成了一個百萬富翁。

　　Assistant: What were you before?

　　助手：以前你是什麼?

　　CEO: A multimillionaire.

　　執行長：千萬富翁。

　　篇三

　　你會說多少英文

　　"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention howunfair it is for my client to be accused of theft.

　　"法官先生，我的當事人被指控偷竊，這是多麼不公正啊。

　　He arrived in New York City a week ago and barelyknew his way around. What's more, he only speaks afew words of English."

　　他一週前才來到紐約，幾乎不認路。而且，他只會說幾個英語單詞。"

　　The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"

　　法官看被告，問道："你會說多少英文?"

　　The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"

　　被告抬起頭，說："把你的錢包給我!"

　　篇四

　　又要結婚了

　　"So you want another day off,”snorted the teacher to his student，Tom.“I am anxious to hear what excuse you have this time. You have been off for your grandfather's funeral four times already.”

　　“這麼說，你又要請一天假，”老師怒氣衝衝地對他的學生湯姆說，“我倒想知道你這次找什麼藉口。你已經請了四次假說去參加你爺爺的葬禮。”

　　Tom replied，"Today my grandma is getting married again.”

　　湯姆回答說:“今天是我奶奶再次舉行婚禮。”

　　篇五

　　Does He Bite 它咬人嗎?

　　Reggie: We have got a new dog. Would you like to come around and play with him?

　　Ron: Well, I don't know---does he bite?

　　Reggie: That's what I want to find out.

　　裡基：我們又得到了一條新狗，你願意過來和他玩一會嗎?

　　羅恩：嗯，我不知道----它咬人嗎?

　　裡基：這正是我想要查明的。

　　篇六

　　The child and his mother

　　孩子和媽媽

　　A curious child asked his mother: “Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?”

　　一個孩子好奇的問媽媽：“媽咪，為什麼你的頭髮有的變灰白了?”

　　The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: “It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!”

　　媽媽想利用這個機會好好教育教育她的孩子：“因為你啊，寶貝。每次你不聽話，我就會有一根頭髮變灰白的。”

　　The child replied innocently: “Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.”

　　孩子天真的回答：“現在我知道為什麼外祖母頭上只有灰白的頭髮了。”

　　篇七

　　Nurse: Don't you like your new baby sister, Johnny?

　　保姆: 約翰尼，你難道不喜歡你新生的小妹妹?

　　Johnny: She's all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.

　　約翰尼: 她還可以，但要是個男孩就好了。威利·史密斯有一個新生的小妹妹。現在他該認為我又在跟他學了。