高中幽默英語笑話譯文

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　1：

　　Arthur was sitting outside his local pub one day，enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a Nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink.

　　一天，亞瑟正坐在當地酒吧的外面，享受著啤酒的美味，逍遙自得。這時一個修女突然出現在他的桌前，開始譴責飲酒所帶來的罪惡。

　　"You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a the blood of the devil!”

　　“年輕人。你應該為你自己而感到恥辱!喝酒是一種罪過!酒精就像是魔鬼的鮮血!”

　　Now Arthur gets pretty annoyed about this，and goes on the offensive. "How do you know Sister?"

　　這時亞瑟感到有些厭煩就開始辯解:“大姐你是怎麼知道的?”

　　"My Mother Superior told me so.”

　　“我們修道院的院長這麼告訴我的。”

　　"But have you ever had a drink yourself`? How can you he sure that what you are saying is right?"

　　“但是你自己從來沒有喝過，你怎麼就知道你說的是正確的呢?”

　　"Don’t be ridiculous一of course I have never taken alcohol myself.”

　　“別開玩笑了，我自己當然沒有沾過酒了。”

　　"Then let me buy you a drink，一if you still believe afterwards that it is evil 1 will give up drink for life.”

　　“那麼我請你喝一杯吧。如果你嘗過之後還是那麼認為，我就一生不再飲酒。”

　　"How could I，a Nun，sit outside this public house drinking?!”

　　“我，一個修女，怎麼能這樣做?坐在酒吧外面喝酒?!”

　　"I’ll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you , then no one will know.”

　　“我會叫服務員把酒倒在茶杯裡的，沒有人會知道。”

　　The Nun reluctantly agrees, so Arthur goes inside to the bar.

　　那個修女極其不情願的同意了。然後亞瑟走進了酒吧。

　　"Another pint for me, and a vodka,” then he lowers his voice and says to the barman，"and could you put the vodka in a teacup?"

　　“再給我來一杯啤酒和一杯伏特加”，他壓低他的嗓音對服務員說，“你能不能把伏特加酒倒在一個茶杯裡?”

　　"Oh no! It’s not that bloody Nun again is it?"

　　“噢，天哪!是不是那個魔鬼之血’的修女又來騙酒喝了?”

　　2：

　　The priest was so concerned with the welfare of his pretty young parishioner that he invited her to his private quarters to discuss her confession.

　　一位神父非常關切教區內一位年輕美麗的教友幸福，因此便邀她到他私人住處討論她的懺悔。

　　"Now, let me get this straight," said the priest. "This young man you went out with did he put his arm around your shoulder like this?"

　　“現在讓我把事情搞清楚，”神父說道，“這個年輕人跟你出去他是不是像這樣把他的手臂繞在你的肩膀?”

　　"Yes, Father, and worse. "

　　“是的，神父，還有更糟的事情呢。”

　　"And did he put his hand on your thigh like this?"

　　“他也像這樣把手放在你的大腿上嗎?"

　　"Yes, Father, and worse. "

　　“是的，神父，還有更壞的呢。”

　　By now the clergyman was thoroughly aroused. He hiked the girl's skirt and gave her a vigorous humping. "And did he do this?" he inquired.

　　此時神父已被刺激得興奮莫名，他撩起女孩的裙子，元氣充沛地和她做起愛來，“他也這樣做嗎?"神父問道。

　　"Yes, Father, and worse, "

　　“是的，神父，還有更糟的呢!”

　　“ But what could be worse than what Ijust did?"

　　“有什麼還比我剛剛所做的更糟呢?"

　　"I'm afraid, Father, that he gave me the clap."

　　“恐怕，神父，他把淋病傳染給我了。”

　　以上就是小編為大家帶來的，希望大家喜歡!