有關英語幽默小短文演講

　　作為人類智慧和創造力的結晶,幽默廣泛地存在於人類社會的各個層面,在我們的日常生活中起著不可或缺的作用。小編整理了，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Old Farmer Johnson was dying.

　　老農約翰遜就要死了。

　　The family was standing around his bed.

　　他的家人都站在床邊。

　　With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."

　　他聲音低沉地對妻子說：“我死後，我想你嫁給農夫瓊斯。”

　　Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you."

　　妻子說：“不，在你死後，我不能嫁給任何人。”

　　Johnson: "But I want you to."

　　約翰遜：“但我希望你這麼做。”

　　Wife: "But why?"

　　妻子：“為什麼?”

　　Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"

　　約翰遜：“因為瓊斯曾在一筆販馬的交易中欺騙了我。”

　　篇二

　　A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park one morning.

　　一天早晨，一位黑人女人和一位金髮女郎正走在公園裡。

　　Suddenly, the brunette notices a dead bird.

　　突然，黑人女人發現了一隻死去的小鳥。

　　"Awww, look at the dead birdie," she says sadly.

　　“哦!看這隻死去的小鳥。”她悲傷地說。

　　The blonde stops, looks up into the sky, and says, "Where? Where?"

　　金髮女郎停下了腳步，她抬頭望著天空，問道：“哪，在那?”

　　篇三

　　Psychiatrist: What's your problem?

　　精神病醫師：你哪裡不舒服?

　　Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

　　病人：我認為我是一隻雞。

　　Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?

　　精神病醫師：這種情況從什麼時候開始的?

　　Patient: Ever since I was an egg!

　　病人：從我還是一隻蛋的時候開始。

　　篇四

　　A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. 一個胖子和一個瘦子在爭論誰更有禮貌。

　　The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. 瘦子說他更有禮貌，因為他經常對女士摘帽示意。

　　But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.但是胖子認為他更有風度，因為無論什麼時候他在車上給別人讓座時，總有兩位女士能坐下。