英語幽默笑話帶翻譯大全

　　冷笑話不同於一般笑話,它以其獨特的制笑機制,能瞬間創造出一種特殊的氛圍。冷笑話作為一種特殊的言語幽默,並未引起學術界的廣泛關注,對於該現象的系統研究也寥寥可數。下面是小編帶來的英語幽默笑話帶翻譯，歡迎閱讀!

　　英語幽默笑話帶翻譯篇一

　　Patience 耐心

　　My friend and I were busy mending fences when my house-keeper arrived. Several times during the day, she drove out, returning 45 minutes later. Feeling curious, my friend asked her:

　　"Where do you keep going?"

　　"Some darn birds built a nest in my car bumper1!" she exclaimed2. "Every two hours I have to go home because the parents are waiting go feed their young. I wish they'd hurry up and raise those kids."

　　我和我的朋友正在忙著修籬笆，這時候，我的管家也來了。在這一天中，她開車出去了好幾次，每次都是四十分鐘後回來，我的朋友感到很奇怪，於是問她：

　　“你總出去幹什麼?”

　　“一些該死的鳥在我的汽車保險槓上出了築一個巢，”她說，“我必須每隔兩小時回一趟家，不然那些大鳥就會等在那裡餵它的小鳥，我真希望它們快點把她們的孩子喂大。”

　　英語幽默笑話帶翻譯篇二

　　I am Lost 老子迷路了

　　There was a man who raised a pig. He felt tired of it and gave it up. However, the pig knew the way to go home. The man did not succeed in doing so several times.

　　One day, the man drove an vehicle, turning many times on the way, then gave it up. Late at night, he telephoned to his family and asked: "Had the pig returned home?"

　　A member of his family answered: "It had." The man roared1: "Let it answer the telephone. I am lost!"

　　某人養一豬，煩，棄之，然豬知歸路，數棄無功。

　　一日，其駕車轉了很多彎尋豬，深夜致電家人，問：“豬歸否?”

　　答曰：“已歸!” 其怒吼：“讓它接電話，老子迷路了!

　　英語幽默笑話帶翻譯篇三

　　A threat 恐嚇

　　A commuter1 sitting on a subway train reading a paper back was so sprawled2 out in the seat that the woman next to him had very little room. When she asked if he could move a bit, he refused.

　　Just then, a man opposite them yelled, "Why don't you sit like a human being!"

　　"What are you going to do if I don't?" came the reply.

　　"Well, for one thing, I'll tell you how that book ends."

　　一位跑地鐵通勤的傢伙四肢伸展地坐在座位上看著一本平裝小說。他旁邊的女士被擠的實在難忍，便要求稍微挪動一下，卻遭到了他的拒絕。

　　這時，坐在對面的一位先生喊道：“你為什麼不能像人一樣坐著呢?”

　　“我就是不願意，看你能把我怎麼樣?”

　　那個人回答說：“那好，只有一個辦法了，我會告訴你這本書是怎樣結的尾。”

　　英語幽默笑話帶翻譯篇四

　　A clear explanation 最好的解釋

　　Working at a theater box-office ticket window poses many challenges in dealing1 with people.

　　A disgruntled customer at a window near mine exclaimed: "No tickets? What do you mean no tickets?"

　　The woman waiting on him smiled sweetly. "I'm terribly sorry," she replied. "Which word didn't you understand?"

　　在戲院售票視窗售票時常與這種人打交道，從而會出現很多新鮮事兒。

　　一次，我隔壁售票口傳來了顧客的抱怨聲：“沒有票啦?你說的沒票了是什麼意思?”

　　那位女服務員笑容可掬地回答說：先生，實在對不起您，哪個字不明白?”

　　英語幽默笑話帶翻譯篇五

　　He walks everywhere he goes 耶穌從不開車

　　A young man came home and said, "Dad, I just got my driver's license1 and would like to use the family car."

　　Father replied, "Ok, son, But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard neat2, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we'll see."

　　Well, several months passed and the young man came into the house with his report card in his hand, "Dad, I got great marks on my report card, I've been keeping my room as neat as apin3, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?"

　　Father replied, "That's all true, but son, you didn't cut your hair."

　　Son said, "But, dad, Jesus had long hair too."

　　Father replied, "Yes, son, you're perfectly4 right, And he walks everywhere he goes."

　　一個小夥子回到家跟爸爸說：“爸爸，我拿駕照了，我想開車。”

　　爸爸答道：“好的，兒子。但是，你要拿到好成績，要把房間給收拾整齊，要把院子打掃乾淨，還要把頭髮給理了。這幾個月做好了我們再談開車的事。”

　　幾個月後，小夥子拿到成績單回到家，“爸爸，我每門功課都得了優，房間整整齊齊，院子乾乾淨淨。我能***嗎?”

　　爸爸回答：“確實做得很好，但是兒子，你還沒有理髮呢。”

　　兒子說：“但是，爸爸，耶穌的頭髮也很長啊。”

　　爸爸回答：“是的，兒子，完全正確。但是耶穌去哪都是走著去的呀!”