搞笑的短篇英語笑話大全

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆。與此同時,笑話也是人們反對極權和專制制度的有力武器。小編整理了搞笑的短篇英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　搞笑的短篇英語笑話：Home Medical Remedy

　　A man walks into his doctor's office and puts a note on the table for the doctor to read. It said, "I can't talk! Help me!"

　　The doctor nodded sagely, and instructed the man to put his thumb on the table. The man thinks to himself that his thumb has nothing to do with his inability to talk, but he does as the doctor ordered.

　　The doctor quickly picked up a big book and whacks the man's thumb with it as hard as he could.

　　"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" the man yelled.

　　"Good, good," the doctor said. "Come back tomorrow and we'll work on the 'B'."

　　搞笑的短篇英語笑話：Take Thee To A Nunnery

　　Sitting behind some nuns ***whose habits partially blocked their view*** at a hockey game, three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move.

　　In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."

　　The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana , there are only 50 nuns living there."

　　The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho , there are only 25 nuns living there."

　　One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm voice said, "Why don't you go to hell? There aren't any nuns there!"

　　搞笑的短篇英語笑話：Like father like son 有其父必有其子

　　Once a boy's grandfather beat his grandson for playing with fire in the courtyard.

　　The boy's father saw this and he got worried about his son. So he took astick and began beating himself. The grandfather was surprised and asked:

　　"Why are you beating yourself?"

　　"You are beating my son and I'm beating your son." The boy's father answered.

　　一個小孩因為玩火被爺爺打了一頓。

　　孩子的父親看到後很心疼自己的兒子。因此，他拿起一根棍子開始打自己。孩子的爺爺見到後很不理解，便問道：

　　“你為什麼打你自己呢?”

　　孩子的父親說：“因為你打了我兒子，所以我也要打你兒子。”

　　搞笑的短篇英語笑話：Absent-minded Mark Twain 心不在焉的馬克·吐溫

　　The famous American writer Mark Twain was well-known for his absent-mindedness.

　　One day, when he was riding in a train, the conductor asked him for his ticket。

　　Mark Twain looked for the ticket in all his pockets, but he didn't find it. At last, the conductor knew the writer, so he said: "It doesn't matter. Show me your ticket on your way back. And if you don't find it, there is no trouble."

　　"Oh, but I must find the dammed thing, otherwise how will I know where I am going?"

　　美國著名作家馬克吐溫以心不在焉著稱於世。

　　一天，他乘火車去旅行，列車員找他查票。

　　馬克·吐溫翻遍了所有衣服的口袋，也沒有找到車票。正好列車員認識這位作家，便說：“真的沒什麼大不了的。回來時你把車票給我看看好了。萬一找不到，也沒有多大關係。”

　　“哦，我必須找到這該死的東西，不然我怎麼知道自己要上哪兒去呢?”