英語笑話小作文

　　笑話作為民間俗文學的一種重要體裁,具有深厚的民族文化內涵。下面是小編帶來的經典，歡迎閱讀!

　　經典篇一

　　Hair Transplant 移植頭髮

　　A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop.

　　"How can I help you?" asked the stylist.

　　"I went for a hair transplant," the guy explained, "but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort1, I will pay you $5000."

　　"No problem," said the stylist, and she quickly shaved her head.

　　一個禿頭的人在一家美容店裡坐了下來。

　　“您需要什麼服務呢?”美容師問。

　　“我以前做過頭髮移植，”這個人解釋道，“可是我忍受不了疼痛。假如你可以讓我的頭髮像你的一樣，卻又不會給我帶來什麼不舒服的感覺，我就給你5000美圓。”

　　“沒問題，”美容師說，於是，她很快剃光了自己的頭髮。

　　經典篇二

　　He Understood 他懂了

　　Two Americans were traveling in Spain.

　　One morning they came into a little restaurant for lunch. They did not know Spanish, and their waiter did not know English. They wanted him to understand that they wanted some milk and sandwiches.

　　At first they pronounced the word "milk" many times. Then they spelled it. But the waiter could not understand them.

　　At last one of them took a piece of paper and began to draw a cow. He was finishing his drawing, when the waiter looked at it and ran out of the restaurant. "Do you see," said one of the travelers, "what a pencil can do for a man who has difficulties1 in a foreign country?"

　　The waiter was back again some time after, but he brought no milk.

　　He put down in front of the two men tickets for a bullfight.

　　兩個美國人在西班牙旅遊。

　　一天上午，他們走進一家小餐館吃午飯。他們不會說西班牙語，侍者也不會說英語。他們想讓侍者知道他們想要點一些牛奶和三明治。

　　起初，他們說了好多次“牛奶”，接著又寫了下來，而侍者還是不明白他們說的是什麼。

　　最後，其中一個人拿出一張紙，畫了一頭牛。畫完後，侍者看了一眼，便跑了出去。“看到了吧，”其中的一個人說道，“一支鉛筆對一個身在國外並遇到困難的人來說是多麼重要!”

　　不一會兒，侍者回來了，不過拿的卻不是牛奶。

　　他在這兩個人面前放了兩張鬥牛的表演票。

　　經典篇三

　　My First and My Last 第一次與最後一次

　　When George was1 thirty-five, he bought a small plane and learned2 to fly it. He soonbecame3 very good and made5 his plane do all kinds of tricks6.

　　George had7 a friend. His name was Mark8. One day George offered9 to take Mark up in his plane. Mark thought10, "I've traveled11 in a big plane several12 times, but I've never been in a small one, so I'll go."

　　They went up, and George flew13 around for half an hour and did14 all kinds of tricks in the air.

　　When they came4 down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely15, and he said16 to his friend in a shaking17 voice18, "Well, George, thank you very much for those two trips in your plane."

　　George was very surprised19 and said, "two trips?"

　　"Yes, my first and my last," answered Mark.

　　喬治今年35歲了，他買了一架小型飛機，開始學習駕駛。他很快就掌握了飛機的駕駛技巧，並可以做出各種各樣的特技飛行。

　　喬治有位朋友叫馬克。一天，喬治主動邀請馬克來乘坐他的飛機。馬克心裡琢磨：“我曾乘坐過好幾次大客機，還從來沒乘坐過小飛機，我應該去體驗一下。”

　　飛機升空後半個小時左右，喬治在空中展示了各種各樣的飛行特技。

　　最後，當他們再次安全地回到地面後，馬克顯得十分激動。他用顫抖的聲音說道：“喬治，非常感謝你讓我乘小飛機做的兩次飛行。”

　　喬治聽了，非常吃驚地問：“兩次飛行?”

　　“是的，我的第一次和最後一次。”馬克答道。

　　經典篇四

　　That's Me 是我啊

　　In a darkest night, a policeman watches a staggering man trying in vain to unlock a door. "Is this your home?" the policeman asks.

　　"Sure, I'll prove it to you if you help me." Inside, the man explains, "You see, this is my bedroom. And this is my wife."

　　"And who is the man next to her?" the policeman wants to know.

　　"That's me!"

　　在一個漆黑的夜晚，一名警察看到一個醉醺醺的男人怎麼也打不開門。“這是你家嗎?”警察問。

　　“當然，如果你幫我，我將證明給你看。”走進屋裡，那人說：“你瞧，這是我的臥室，這是我太太。”

　　“那她身邊的男人是誰?”警察想知道。

　　“那是我啊!”

　　經典篇五

　　The Customer Is Always Right 顧客永遠是對的

　　The manager of a shop was yelling at one of his staff.

　　"I saw you arguing with a customer," he said crossly. "Will you please remember that in my shop the customer is always right? Do you understand?"

　　"Yes, sir," said the assistant. "The customer is always right."

　　"Now what were you arguing about?"

　　"Well sir, he said you were an idiot."

　　商店的經理正在訓斥一名員工。

　　“我看見你和一個顧客吵架，” 他非常惱火地說，“請你記住，在我的店裡，顧客永遠是對的。你懂嗎?”

　　“是的，先生，”店員說，“顧客永遠是對的。”

　　“那你剛才和他吵什麼?”

　　“噢，先生，他說你是個白痴。”